It has been about 45 days since we miscarried and about 30 days since I posted anything and really not much has changed. We continue to wait for my hormone levels to return to zero. I continue to get my blood drawn every two weeks and I continue to hope to hear that day that the number is zero. I continue to not hear that but we are getting close.
One week after miscarrying my number was 972, two weeks after that my number was down to 61 and two weeks after that my number was down to 5 and now we wait two more weeks to hopefully hear we are clear to go. Not that I am sure what that would exactly mean... I have heard a few different options for what is to be next in our journey but for now we know that we need to drop that number to zero to move on.
In hopes of moving the number quicker I have started acupuncture. The other surrogates in my support group and some friends of mine swear by it. There have been studies to show that acupuncture helps increase blood flow to the uterus and increase fertility. I have heard numerous stories about failed attempts and then following acupuncture a positive outcome...a healthy baby or two. The acupuncturist swears that it will help renew and refresh me and also prep my body for the pending transfer and upcoming pregnancy. I have been two times and it is a totally new experience for me. It is almost like he is talking a different language to me. I've had 13 needles carefully and specifically placed each session along with a heat lamp over my abdomen to work it's magic. The acupuncturist recommends one session per week up till transfer but with the holidays I won't be back till after the new year. I enjoy the sessions and do feel that it gives me more energy and positivity in this journey and everyday.
The intended father gave me the best advice for now... "let's just enjoy the holidays and look forward to January." And that is exactly what I intend to do.
Happy Holidays
Sunday, December 18, 2011
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Looking Forward
I just really wanted to say that I am ok. Many people have been checking on me and really I am doing better. There are definitely times that I struggle with the miscarriage but I know that won't help anything. So I continue looking forward.
I continue to bleed and shed the lining in my uterus, as my body attempts to return to normal. The lining that we worked so hard to build up and now we hope will quickly thin so we can move on. I went in today for lab work and to get a new plan established with the fertility clinic. My HCG hormone has dropped significantly since the last time it was checked but that was when I was approximately 5 weeks pregnant and when we wanted it to be high. Now we want it to drop. The plan is to recheck the level in 2-3 weeks and go from there. Hopefully it will be down to zero and we will be talking about a frozen transfer. I have heard that acupuncture helps lower levels after miscarriages and then increases blood flow to the uterus when doing IVF so I may just try that to help my body do what it needs to.
I continue to bleed and shed the lining in my uterus, as my body attempts to return to normal. The lining that we worked so hard to build up and now we hope will quickly thin so we can move on. I went in today for lab work and to get a new plan established with the fertility clinic. My HCG hormone has dropped significantly since the last time it was checked but that was when I was approximately 5 weeks pregnant and when we wanted it to be high. Now we want it to drop. The plan is to recheck the level in 2-3 weeks and go from there. Hopefully it will be down to zero and we will be talking about a frozen transfer. I have heard that acupuncture helps lower levels after miscarriages and then increases blood flow to the uterus when doing IVF so I may just try that to help my body do what it needs to.
Monday, November 7, 2011
The last few days
Friday was extremely hard, emotionally. I had a really hard time getting my head around what had occurred. I knew that this was a risk that we took when we started this process but was not expecting it at all.
Saturday was a little bit easier but continued wondering what if I was fifteen pounds lighter, what if I was less or more active, was it my sleeping on my stomach that one time??? I continued to know deep down that it was nothing I did but the thoughts continued in my head.
Sunday was much better. No tears were shed and acceptance had set in. I was upset but started looking to the next step, passing the baby. The anxiety then set in. I had read lots on line and was super scared for what was to come. Thanks to other surrogates and the clinic my worries were put to rest. I took the medication at 10:30pm last night and passed what I believe was the baby @ 3:15am. I forgot what contractions really felt like, whew. And to know that they weren't leading to the goal of a healthy baby birth was really hard. I got through it and am feeling better now. I finally got some sleep after 4 am and am just cramping now. Mentally I am accepting what has happened in the last few days and I know that we will be ok.
I can't thank all my friends and family enough for the continued love and support that has been shown to me during these few days.Even though my husband was out of town he was amazing. My IF's were also so uplifting and supportive and that truly made such a difference. I am excited to be on this journey with them. I am such a lucky girl.
Saturday was a little bit easier but continued wondering what if I was fifteen pounds lighter, what if I was less or more active, was it my sleeping on my stomach that one time??? I continued to know deep down that it was nothing I did but the thoughts continued in my head.
Sunday was much better. No tears were shed and acceptance had set in. I was upset but started looking to the next step, passing the baby. The anxiety then set in. I had read lots on line and was super scared for what was to come. Thanks to other surrogates and the clinic my worries were put to rest. I took the medication at 10:30pm last night and passed what I believe was the baby @ 3:15am. I forgot what contractions really felt like, whew. And to know that they weren't leading to the goal of a healthy baby birth was really hard. I got through it and am feeling better now. I finally got some sleep after 4 am and am just cramping now. Mentally I am accepting what has happened in the last few days and I know that we will be ok.
I can't thank all my friends and family enough for the continued love and support that has been shown to me during these few days.Even though my husband was out of town he was amazing. My IF's were also so uplifting and supportive and that truly made such a difference. I am excited to be on this journey with them. I am such a lucky girl.
Friday, November 4, 2011
A sad update...
I went in today for my 9 week scheduled ultrasound and to our surprise and saddened hearts we saw a sleeping angel baby without a heartbeat. I was to say the least devastated. The clinic attributes it to the bleeding that happened a little over a week ago and the thought that the stress of it all was too overwhelming for the baby to survive. The growth of the baby stopped about 3-4 days after the bleeding. The meds I am on have kept the baby inside of me but nothing could keep the baby living.
I felt so defeated and like such a failure. All day I have been racking my brain to figure out what I was doing or what I did wrong and in my heart I know that I did nothing wrong but my heart still hurts. Lucky for me I have some amazing friends and IF's. The fathers were so positive and loving towards me and all that we have gone through together that I couldn't have asked for more. My friends and other surrogates have been so supportive and caring towards the situation and appreciate all the love shown toward me.
So now we take a deep breath and let my body get back to normal before we try again. Yes we are going to try again and I have confidence that the next time will be the time that we get a healthy baby for these amazing guys.
I felt so defeated and like such a failure. All day I have been racking my brain to figure out what I was doing or what I did wrong and in my heart I know that I did nothing wrong but my heart still hurts. Lucky for me I have some amazing friends and IF's. The fathers were so positive and loving towards me and all that we have gone through together that I couldn't have asked for more. My friends and other surrogates have been so supportive and caring towards the situation and appreciate all the love shown toward me.
So now we take a deep breath and let my body get back to normal before we try again. Yes we are going to try again and I have confidence that the next time will be the time that we get a healthy baby for these amazing guys.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
bleeding :(
So here is a little background information to get the whole picture. I went last Friday for my 7 week ultrasound and as you know we found 1 healthy baby. But we also found a pretty sizable clot, which they suspect to be where the other embryo attempted to attach but didn't survive. They said they would just keep an eye on it and most likely it will just reabsorb back into my body and not cause any worries. The clinic said it was common and they have seen it before so they didn't seem to worried but by the face that the person doing the ultrasound I got the feeling that it was bigger than they like and expect.
So that takes us to Monday night, I got to come home from work early because we weren't busy enough and I climbed into bed at 3am. I was awoken at 4am by a gush of blood. I ran to the bathroom where I saw more bleeding than I have ever wanted to see. I started to really worry but knew that at just 7 weeks pregnant there was nothing anyone could do. I cleaned up and went back to bed to attempt to sleep. I had some pretty intense cramping and was really scared. But I was able to go back to sleep and woke at 9. I went to tell the husband what had happened and as I stood up from the couch more gushing blood. Again I really started to worry about this baby. I called the clinic and they got me in immediately. I was relieved that they could see me so quickly but know that when they put you on the schedule immediately it is pretty serious. I went to the clinic and had another ultrasound where they saw that the clot was almost completely gone, good news. But while I was there she saw the amount of bleeding and was concerned. So she put me on an additional progesterone medication and bedrest. But the baby looked good. And that was all I was concerned about.
I went home and was happy to hear that the baby was ok and that the clot was gone but I remained scared that the bleeding would return. I followed her directions strictly and the bleeding has stopped. The cramping has stopped and I am off bedrest!! All good news!
Tomorrow I am 8 weeks exactly. One more week till my last ultrasound at the fertility clinic, and then hopefully I will be cleared to go to my OB and be a regular patient. I am hoping that the bleeding is done and the only excitement to be seen is the good news of a healthy baby.
So that takes us to Monday night, I got to come home from work early because we weren't busy enough and I climbed into bed at 3am. I was awoken at 4am by a gush of blood. I ran to the bathroom where I saw more bleeding than I have ever wanted to see. I started to really worry but knew that at just 7 weeks pregnant there was nothing anyone could do. I cleaned up and went back to bed to attempt to sleep. I had some pretty intense cramping and was really scared. But I was able to go back to sleep and woke at 9. I went to tell the husband what had happened and as I stood up from the couch more gushing blood. Again I really started to worry about this baby. I called the clinic and they got me in immediately. I was relieved that they could see me so quickly but know that when they put you on the schedule immediately it is pretty serious. I went to the clinic and had another ultrasound where they saw that the clot was almost completely gone, good news. But while I was there she saw the amount of bleeding and was concerned. So she put me on an additional progesterone medication and bedrest. But the baby looked good. And that was all I was concerned about.
I went home and was happy to hear that the baby was ok and that the clot was gone but I remained scared that the bleeding would return. I followed her directions strictly and the bleeding has stopped. The cramping has stopped and I am off bedrest!! All good news!
Tomorrow I am 8 weeks exactly. One more week till my last ultrasound at the fertility clinic, and then hopefully I will be cleared to go to my OB and be a regular patient. I am hoping that the bleeding is done and the only excitement to be seen is the good news of a healthy baby.
Friday, October 21, 2011
7 weeks today!
Sunday, October 16, 2011
ugggghh that smell!
I despise this part of being pregnant, and I remember it so vividly. This morning my husband and I prepped a nice carne asada steak and all the toppings for a full Mexican dinner. We let the steak marinate all day. It sounded so amazing and I was so ready to dig in until the moment he started cooking it. At that point I lost all my appetite and started to get nauseous. No matter what I did the smell of dinner was making me sick. It was all throughout the house and everyone was anxious for dinner, everyone but me. So as the family sat down to a big Mexican feast I sat there with them and ate saltine crackers with peanut butter and jelly on them, my staple for a small meal when nothing else sounds good. I distinctly remember this feeling when I was pregnant with my second and I also remember that it is going to happen at the most random of times and with the most random of foods.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
offical due date...
I had the last of my weekly blood draws on Monday and my hcg levels continue to rise. I am super happy that no longer on Mondays do I need to go to the clinic and get poked for more and more blood. I am shocked that I even have blood left at this point. I counted on my calendar and so far since August I have had 10 tubes of blood drawn. But hey I'm done!!!
I also received the good news that my levels were good and the clinic told me time to schedule the ultrasounds! My first one is on Oct. 21st. I am ecstatic! One of the IF's will be able to make it up to see the baby for the first time. How crazy is that? In 10 days we will get to see this little miracle via ultrasound. We will also get to see if it is one or two babies, although I am pretty sure that it is just one. But one never knows till we see the ultrasound.
I am currently 5 weeks and 4 days. The clinic told me my official due date is... JUNE 9TH! I am excited. I have had two other June babies and it just feels right to deliver in the summer. I am feeling good, still tired but no sickness... yet. Knock on wood. I think it's gonna hit me how real this all is when the ultrasound comes and we have proof right before our eyes. I can't wait to share that amazing moment with the IF!.
I also received the good news that my levels were good and the clinic told me time to schedule the ultrasounds! My first one is on Oct. 21st. I am ecstatic! One of the IF's will be able to make it up to see the baby for the first time. How crazy is that? In 10 days we will get to see this little miracle via ultrasound. We will also get to see if it is one or two babies, although I am pretty sure that it is just one. But one never knows till we see the ultrasound.
I am currently 5 weeks and 4 days. The clinic told me my official due date is... JUNE 9TH! I am excited. I have had two other June babies and it just feels right to deliver in the summer. I am feeling good, still tired but no sickness... yet. Knock on wood. I think it's gonna hit me how real this all is when the ultrasound comes and we have proof right before our eyes. I can't wait to share that amazing moment with the IF!.
Saturday, October 8, 2011
Whew.... I'm tired!
I am 5 weeks and 1 day pregnant and boy am I exhausted. I can't seem to get enough sleep. I wake up from a good nights sleep and all I want to do is go back to sleep. I never get to do that with 3 little kids running around but I would sure like to. I have been taking naps in the middle of the day prior to working, totally not normal for me, and falling asleep earlier than the kids sometimes. I guess all my energy is going to get this baby to grow. So I will sacrifice and sleep, all for the baby. (he he I just love any excuse to get a little extra time sleeping!)
Labwork again Monday morning and then it's time to schedule the ultrasound.
Labwork again Monday morning and then it's time to schedule the ultrasound.
Monday, October 3, 2011
3rd beta
I went in for my usual Monday labwork. Great news, my beta, (hcg, pregnancy hormone) continues to rise. Today's resulted @ 208! Such good news to hear.
Nice to know it's burried it's way into my lining and there for the long haul.
Nice to know it's burried it's way into my lining and there for the long haul.
4 weeks and 3 days
The fourth week of pregnancy marks the beginning of the embryonic period, which is when the blastocyst begins to transform into an embryo. The embryonic period is when the baby's brain, spinal cord, heart, and other organs begin to form. Your baby is now about 1/25 of an inch long (0.04 inches).
The embryo is made of three layers:
- The top layer, the ectoderm, will give rise to a groove along the midline of your baby's body. This will become the neural tube, where your baby's brain, spinal cord, spinal nerves, and backbone will develop.
- Your baby's heart and a primitive circulatory system will form in the middle layer of cells, which is called the mesoderm. This layer of cells will also serve as the foundation for your baby's bones, muscles, kidneys, and much of the reproductive system.
- The inner layer of cells, the endoderm, will become a simple tube lined with mucous membranes. Your baby's lungs, intestines, and bladder will develop here.
The placenta has also started to form -- it is producing hCG, among other hormones, which is an important hormone in pregnancy.
It's amazing all that is going on inside of me.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
so here is the details...
I finally got the call that I/we have been waiting for. I had my second beta lab draw today at 8am after working all night. I came home and tried super hard to fall asleep and hope that the time would go by faster but I wasn't able to really sleep. I was dozing off and on but then the phone rang and I sprung out of bed.
The clinic had only good things to say. My first beta was 6.34 (anything over 5 is considered pregnant) and my second beta was 26.1! They just want to see that it doubles between draws. It definately doubled, in fact it quadroupled and the clinic was estatic!
So next thing is to continue on my meds and go in for another beta on Mon. am to continue to check to make sure it's doubling. After that is the ultrasound at approx 7 weeks pregnant to see if there is one or two sacs containing babies. I am approx 3 weeks and 6 days pregnant now, so not too far from now.
I am beyond estatic for the IF's and can't express how much I am gonna do my best to grow a perfect little baby... or two.
The clinic had only good things to say. My first beta was 6.34 (anything over 5 is considered pregnant) and my second beta was 26.1! They just want to see that it doubles between draws. It definately doubled, in fact it quadroupled and the clinic was estatic!
So next thing is to continue on my meds and go in for another beta on Mon. am to continue to check to make sure it's doubling. After that is the ultrasound at approx 7 weeks pregnant to see if there is one or two sacs containing babies. I am approx 3 weeks and 6 days pregnant now, so not too far from now.
I am beyond estatic for the IF's and can't express how much I am gonna do my best to grow a perfect little baby... or two.
and the waiting continues!
I am so tired of waiting. It is so hard and it's not even my baby! I just want to hear the news that we are pregnant. I can not even imagine how the IP's are dealing with this waiting period.
I took a home pregnancy test on Monday and didn't get the birthday present that I wanted, a positive, but I am still thinking positive. It was only 5 days post transfer and still very early. I just couldn't help myself and now I know why the clinic wants you to avoid taking them. I got so upset following the negative result. I was afraid that it failed, that I had failed my IP's. But after taking a deep breath and talking to some proven surrogates and the clinic I felt much better and much more positive.
Luckily tomorrow, or should I say today, since it is 1am, I have another beta lab test and following that we should be getting news. I had my first one on Tuesday and tomorrows value needs to be double the value that it was on Tuesday. So hopefully this waiting period is coming to an end. Hopefully today is the day that I get to scream that we are pregnant.
So stay tuned... as soon as I know anything I will post more.
Positive thoughts for doubling numbers for today!
I took a home pregnancy test on Monday and didn't get the birthday present that I wanted, a positive, but I am still thinking positive. It was only 5 days post transfer and still very early. I just couldn't help myself and now I know why the clinic wants you to avoid taking them. I got so upset following the negative result. I was afraid that it failed, that I had failed my IP's. But after taking a deep breath and talking to some proven surrogates and the clinic I felt much better and much more positive.
Luckily tomorrow, or should I say today, since it is 1am, I have another beta lab test and following that we should be getting news. I had my first one on Tuesday and tomorrows value needs to be double the value that it was on Tuesday. So hopefully this waiting period is coming to an end. Hopefully today is the day that I get to scream that we are pregnant.
So stay tuned... as soon as I know anything I will post more.
Positive thoughts for doubling numbers for today!
Sunday, September 25, 2011
I hate waiting!
The waiting is the worst part. The shots, weekly or bi-weekly lab draws, meds, numerous vaginal ultrasounds, and bed rest don't compare to the waiting period. I would do just about anything to get a positive result like yesterday. I find myself constantly thinking about how far along the embryos are, when I can take a home pregnancy test, get my HCG lab drawn and get the amazing news that we all want... a POSITIVE result to a pregnancy test. I even dreamt about taking a pregnancy test and it comes up positive. I woke this morning and had to ask my husband if it truly happened it was sooooo real. Maybe that is a good sign, maybe I am foreseeing the future.
All I want for my birthday (tomorrow) is a positive pregnancy test!!!!
All I want for my birthday (tomorrow) is a positive pregnancy test!!!!
Friday, September 23, 2011
Belly Love!
As my 48 hours of bedrest comes to an end I find myself thinking, praying, hoping and loving these babies in me.
Thursday, September 22, 2011
I am a Lucky Lady!
It has been just a few hours over 24 hours of bedrest now and my butt is sore. I have laid down and followed doctors orders quite strictly. My husband and kids have been on me. Anytime I get up they all start yelling at me to lay down! It's really cute but I do have to get up to go to the bathroom and to bed.
I am continuing to get spoiled rotten. I received breakfast in bed by my 5 year old daughter, juice in bed by my 4 year old and a foot massage by my 7 year old. My husband is the absolute best. He has brought me my favorite Mexican burrito in bed/couch for lunch and I am awaiting dinner as we speak. The support I continue to get continues to amaze me. I have had numerous text messages and emails from friends, family, and other surrogates all asking how I'm doing. My mom just picked up the kids after school and took them to her house so the hubby could go to work and I could continue my resting. I love my family and friends. They are truly the best and couldn't ask for more support! xoxoxo to you all!
When everyone asks how I am I tell them all the same thing. I feel fine. Every little movement I make I am careful to watch how I get up or how I roll over just to make sure that I am doing everything I can to protect these precious embryos. Every little gas bubble/ cramp makes me panic and go straight to the internet and research the normal feelings. My mind keeps wandering at all the possibilities that can come in the months ahead.
I plan on continuing the bedrest for another 24 hours, as doctor has prescribed and probably maybe longer. I could get used to being served!
I am continuing to get spoiled rotten. I received breakfast in bed by my 5 year old daughter, juice in bed by my 4 year old and a foot massage by my 7 year old. My husband is the absolute best. He has brought me my favorite Mexican burrito in bed/couch for lunch and I am awaiting dinner as we speak. The support I continue to get continues to amaze me. I have had numerous text messages and emails from friends, family, and other surrogates all asking how I'm doing. My mom just picked up the kids after school and took them to her house so the hubby could go to work and I could continue my resting. I love my family and friends. They are truly the best and couldn't ask for more support! xoxoxo to you all!
When everyone asks how I am I tell them all the same thing. I feel fine. Every little movement I make I am careful to watch how I get up or how I roll over just to make sure that I am doing everything I can to protect these precious embryos. Every little gas bubble/ cramp makes me panic and go straight to the internet and research the normal feelings. My mind keeps wandering at all the possibilities that can come in the months ahead.
I plan on continuing the bedrest for another 24 hours, as doctor has prescribed and probably maybe longer. I could get used to being served!
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
princess of the couch!
So today was the big day, the long awaited day and it went GREAT! I got a great nights sleep and woke to my kids wishing me good luck at the doctor's today, (We have yet to tell them what we are doing but they know that I had a procedure to be done at the doctor's office), and my husband had made me a big gourmet breakfast. I got a text from my IP's wishing me good luck and sending hugs and sticky thoughts from Utah. It started the day out just right.
We were off to the clinic and I was super excited. I had done all my daily meds and was ready to get pregnant! The procedure went off without a hitch. To see how it was done was so amazing. I rested at the office for approx. 20 min following the implant of two healthy 5 day embryos. The clinic surrogate director text me that they were some of the best embryos she had ever seen, not that I'm bragging. Then the husband took me home where there was lunch waiting for me and my 4 year old telling me he was ready to serve me for the next few days. And if you could hear his little lisp it was just so cute. So here I am now on the couch relaxing and thinking sticky thoughts for the embryos.
I go back to the clinic on the 27th and the 29th for HCG lab draws, (which will show if I am pregnant). I don't know that I can wait that long to know. I am hoping to wait till then but I may have to do a home pregnancy test prior to then. Well see.
STICKY STICKY STICKY!
We were off to the clinic and I was super excited. I had done all my daily meds and was ready to get pregnant! The procedure went off without a hitch. To see how it was done was so amazing. I rested at the office for approx. 20 min following the implant of two healthy 5 day embryos. The clinic surrogate director text me that they were some of the best embryos she had ever seen, not that I'm bragging. Then the husband took me home where there was lunch waiting for me and my 4 year old telling me he was ready to serve me for the next few days. And if you could hear his little lisp it was just so cute. So here I am now on the couch relaxing and thinking sticky thoughts for the embryos.
I go back to the clinic on the 27th and the 29th for HCG lab draws, (which will show if I am pregnant). I don't know that I can wait that long to know. I am hoping to wait till then but I may have to do a home pregnancy test prior to then. Well see.
STICKY STICKY STICKY!
Sunday, September 18, 2011
only days now
So in just a matter of days I will be pregnant! It is so weird to think about that. We never planned our pregnancies so to think that today I can have caffeine, sushi, a glass of wine or whatever I want, in a few days all the restrictions start. I start taking the best care of my body not for me but for the baby or babies inside of me! Such an amazing thought.
I heard from the IF (intended father) yesterday and good news, the retrieval was done and a more than normal amount of eggs were retrieved. So now we wait over the weekend and hopefully they will grow and divide or do whatever it is that they need to and transfer will be Tues or Wed. The clinic called me also to make sure that I am available for an emergency transfer on Monday if needed but I have a good feeling about this and don't think we will need the Monday transfer.
I am so excited. I can't say it enough! After that lunch on Friday with my IP's (intended parents) I left with such a feeling of contentment and it makes me more and more determined and satisfied to know that we are gonna give them a baby!
I heard from the IF (intended father) yesterday and good news, the retrieval was done and a more than normal amount of eggs were retrieved. So now we wait over the weekend and hopefully they will grow and divide or do whatever it is that they need to and transfer will be Tues or Wed. The clinic called me also to make sure that I am available for an emergency transfer on Monday if needed but I have a good feeling about this and don't think we will need the Monday transfer.
I am so excited. I can't say it enough! After that lunch on Friday with my IP's (intended parents) I left with such a feeling of contentment and it makes me more and more determined and satisfied to know that we are gonna give them a baby!
Friday, September 16, 2011
One great lunch
We went to lunch today with our Intended Fathers and it was just great. We got to sit outside and enjoy the sunshine and just chat. I really enjoy getting to know them and them getting to know me and my family. It just felt so good to talk and confirm feelings and clear up confusion prior to the transfer.
Eggs should have been retrieved today so if all continues to go well transfer is scheduled to be on Wed. I can't tell you how excited I am to get pregnant. I can't wait to bring these guys the amazing gift of a baby or babies.
As far as meds and the actual process goes I got my "to go" call Wednesday evening. That call means that it is time to move to different meds and try to fool your body into thinking that ovulation is occurring, hence mimicking the donors cycle. Then when they are ready 2 embryos will be transferred in my body and hopefully stick really really well.
Aggghhhh this is really moving along. I am so anxious for Wednesday!
Eggs should have been retrieved today so if all continues to go well transfer is scheduled to be on Wed. I can't tell you how excited I am to get pregnant. I can't wait to bring these guys the amazing gift of a baby or babies.
As far as meds and the actual process goes I got my "to go" call Wednesday evening. That call means that it is time to move to different meds and try to fool your body into thinking that ovulation is occurring, hence mimicking the donors cycle. Then when they are ready 2 embryos will be transferred in my body and hopefully stick really really well.
Aggghhhh this is really moving along. I am so anxious for Wednesday!
meds meds and more meds!
I mentioned earlier how scientific this whole process is and I never expected this many meds. Lucky for me I really don't mind shots and I am getting really good at swallowing horse size pills. Just wanted to show what I take everday am and pm.
AM meds
TOTALLY WORTH IT, THOUGH!
AM meds
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Keep on keepin on!
I went in today for my ultrasound to check the lining of my uterus and good news... it's measuring 7.5cm to 9.4cm. This is the part of the last cycle where we got hung up due to my super thin lining. So needless to say I am so super excited. Nothing now stands between me getting pregnant! Little over two weeks and I should be knocked up. I am ecstatic for my IF's and can't wait to give them what they have always wanted. So now I am to keep on keepin on with the meds and just hold steady till September 18th, transfer day!!!
Sunday, August 14, 2011
And we're back on track!
It hasn't been a lot to post until recently. Since the last time I posted I was waiting to hear on what the plan would be since my uterine lining was so thin. Well here is what happened. The intended parents decided to scratch the July transfer and wait for better conditions in September. I was really disappointed in myself and in the process but I have come to realize I'm ok and it is just a few months till we move forward.
So in the meantime, we ran a mock cycle with some extra meds and followed my uterine lining via ultrasounds and good news is my lining responded well and we are moving forward with the September transfer date!!!! So where we stand now is I am taking my birth control, (to get my cycle and the egg donor's cycles to match), taking baby aspirin (to increase blood flow), and taking daily Lupron injections (to keep me from ovulating)all daily. We have the next baseline ultrasound scheduled for the 23rd and I am ready this time.
I have my husband and friends asking me if I am ready? My answer to this is YES! I am cautiously hopeful and really wanting to give this couple something that they have so desperately wanted. I didn't realize a few months ago how emotionally invested I was in this process till the clinic halted the last cycle. I want to be excited but I don't want anything to hold us up this time. I am confident this time will be it!
Stay tuned...
So in the meantime, we ran a mock cycle with some extra meds and followed my uterine lining via ultrasounds and good news is my lining responded well and we are moving forward with the September transfer date!!!! So where we stand now is I am taking my birth control, (to get my cycle and the egg donor's cycles to match), taking baby aspirin (to increase blood flow), and taking daily Lupron injections (to keep me from ovulating)all daily. We have the next baseline ultrasound scheduled for the 23rd and I am ready this time.
I have my husband and friends asking me if I am ready? My answer to this is YES! I am cautiously hopeful and really wanting to give this couple something that they have so desperately wanted. I didn't realize a few months ago how emotionally invested I was in this process till the clinic halted the last cycle. I want to be excited but I don't want anything to hold us up this time. I am confident this time will be it!
Stay tuned...
Thursday, June 30, 2011
So scientific!
When I first chose to embark on this journey I really didn't know what I was in for. I knew how amazing it would be to end up with this nice healthy baby for F and D. And I knew how awesome it would be to help them become a family. And I knew all the comes with pregnancy and what not. What I didn't know was exactly how scientific it would be to get me pregnant. Dave and I have never had to worry about things like this. We have always had the other worry that oh no please don't let us be pregnant again! So when I got deeper into this adventure I was amazed how precise and scientific this whole process is.
I know that I told you that I was started on meds a while ago and it has been going well. I have been very religious with the meds because there were so many I didn't want to mess anything up. They give you a schedule of what to take when and it is like a map to getting pregnant. It looks overwhelming but it must work so I carry that schedule with me everyday and look at it numerous times a day. I cross off the meds as I take them and count down the days till the transfer. I get excited everyday that passes knowing that we are one day closer to getting F and D a baby, or two!
Also on the calendar are multiple blood draws, ultrasounds and other misc. dotor appointments at the clinic. Like Monday I had a blood draw to test drug levels and today I had an ultrasound to see the results of one of the injections that I take. Unfortunately the result was less that what they hoped and I was so bummed. They were doing measurements in my uterus and need to know numbers down to the mm. Crazy huh? I know that I have been religious with the meds and the schedule, just like the clinic said. And I know that the tech told me it's nothing that I have done it's just my body but I can't help feeling like a failure. And if you know me, you know that I HATE to fail at things!! So now I just wait. The clinic is going to talk to F and D and see what the next move is. I really don't want this to delay the transfer but I do know that I want the best chances for this baby for F and D. So if the transfer needs to wait... then wait I will.
I know that I told you that I was started on meds a while ago and it has been going well. I have been very religious with the meds because there were so many I didn't want to mess anything up. They give you a schedule of what to take when and it is like a map to getting pregnant. It looks overwhelming but it must work so I carry that schedule with me everyday and look at it numerous times a day. I cross off the meds as I take them and count down the days till the transfer. I get excited everyday that passes knowing that we are one day closer to getting F and D a baby, or two!
Also on the calendar are multiple blood draws, ultrasounds and other misc. dotor appointments at the clinic. Like Monday I had a blood draw to test drug levels and today I had an ultrasound to see the results of one of the injections that I take. Unfortunately the result was less that what they hoped and I was so bummed. They were doing measurements in my uterus and need to know numbers down to the mm. Crazy huh? I know that I have been religious with the meds and the schedule, just like the clinic said. And I know that the tech told me it's nothing that I have done it's just my body but I can't help feeling like a failure. And if you know me, you know that I HATE to fail at things!! So now I just wait. The clinic is going to talk to F and D and see what the next move is. I really don't want this to delay the transfer but I do know that I want the best chances for this baby for F and D. So if the transfer needs to wait... then wait I will.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
How we got here...
I haven’t told everyone yet that I have embarked on this journey. Some people know and some will find out soon (especially since I have now put this out there!). I have kind of waited till we were further in this journey to share news. But I did want to share about how we made the decision to start this adventure.
It all started about a year or so ago. We were trying to teach the kids about giving and donating and helping others. The kids were very aware of donating monitarily but we wanted to teach them that there is more than just giving your money. So after lots of thought and discussion we decided that what better way to teach the kids than to help another family complete their family. We were quite aware of what pregnancy would do to my body, since we have survived it three times now.
So we jumped in full force and we are now on our way. I’ll give you the quick update as to where we are as of now. I have been matched with an absolutely amazing couple (F and D). We have talked on the phone and they came, (5+ hours), just to have breakfast with us, and we just love them. So I am taking all the meds that I need to to prep for implantation on July 16th or 17th. So as things move along I will for sure keep you posted.
Welcome to our adventure!
So welcome. I am really new to the whole blogging thing but I think I am gonna give it a chance. With all the amazingness that is to be coming up I want to be able to share with the friends and family that love and support me.
I just want to put it out there how excited I am for this journey. I know sounds weird to some of you but I’m excited to get pregnant and then give birth only to give that baby away to some amazing people. It is going to be such an amazing gift and experience that I am super excited to share it all. So here I go…
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