33 weeks

33 weeks and getting close! I keep getting told, "oh my gosh she's dropped!" or "she's so low!" and trust me I feel it. I remember feeling this with my last just a few weeks before I delivered. She just feels heavy and keeps the pressure on my bladder! I am also starting to really feel the Braxton Hicks contractions and also some painful contractions here and there. Nothing to be too excited about but definitely showing me my body is moving toward delivery!!! It is so crazy to think that pretty soon this experience will be over. I have really started to enjoy the pregnancy and the feeling of helping. The one thing that really has surprised me about the surrogacy is the amount pressure I feel to give this family a perfectly healthy term baby. No one has put this pressure on me it's just myself. I try to put myself in their situation and really started to realize how hard it must be for them to have no control over their most precious cargo. I know that I have and will continue to do everything just perfectly and somethings are still out of my control. I just want the best for these parents and this baby. For example, earlier in the week I went to bed after working and got up a few times during my sleep and didn't feel Charlotte move. Not too weird because she was probably sleeping with me. But after I woke and had something to eat and some orange juice I still didn't feel her active self. Long story short I went to triage at Labor and Delivery to be hooked up to the monitors just to check her heart rate and movement. All was fine and I was probably worrying for nothing but I just didn't want anything to be wrong. If that had been one of my own kids I am not sure that I would have gone to triage but in this situation I felt super responsible for the health of Charlotte. I feel that more now than ever. The closer we get to delivery the more I look forward to seeing this family hold the precious cargo that I have been holding for 8 months now.

 

 

 

 

wokwo