35 weeks!!

35 weeks and getting huge, well at least feeling huge! We started the 35th week with a big family brunch. The IF's came up for brunch with me, my husband, my kids, my parents and the IF's. It was so nice to have my two families together! We had a great time introducing our kids to the dads and they loved putting faces to names and stories of the IF's. It also didn't hurt that the dads brought them all Christmas presents that they got to open and enjoy that day. We then took a quick ride over to the hospital to show the dads where we will be when the time comes. I showed em the entrances and the floor where we will deliver, my work at the NICU, and the floor where we will all recover and enjoy Ms. Charlotte. It made it all really real for all of us. I know that they want me to hold out till after Christmas and I hope that happens for them but I don't think it will.

 I have been feeling good. But there are times throughout the day and night that I feel that she is so heavy and just gonna fall out anytime. Like tonight I have been having this feeling that anytime I stand up my water is gonna break and off to the hospital we will go. I have had some contractions for the last few hours but nothing progressive so I continue to hydrate with lots of water and rest rest rest. It is just so hard because I wanna hold out longer but I know that my body and Charlotte are on their own time frame. What does amaze me is that with all of the technology in baby making why can't the doctors tell us exactly when she will be here?

 

34 weeks

A quick pic of me and Charlotte  at 34 weeks and in line to see Santa!

34 weeks

    34 weeks started out very interesting. I went to my normal doctors appointment and came home on modified bed rest with no work for two weeks! eek!! I told the doctor that I had been having some random contractions, as many as 3-5 an hour with an increase after working and lots of heavy pressure from Charlotte being so low. His response was to check my cervix to see where we are. And to my surprise and his I am 1.5-2 cm dilated. That isn't that far since I have to get to 10 cm to deliver Charlotte but seeing that I am still only 34 weeks he was not wanting me to work anymore. So I am off work for at least 2 weeks. I am to stay off my feet as much as possible and rest and relax a lot.
    So I went home and have been doing just that for the last 3 days. My husband has really been such an amazing help. He is for sure husband of the year! He doesn't want me to do anything that may set me into labor. He was laid off his job 3 weeks ago and I know that everything happens for a reason and maybe this was the reason, to help me grow Charlotte for a few more weeks. I am so blessed to have him!!!
    The doctor also said he won't stop my labor after I turn 35 weeks, this Sunday! Oh my that is really soon! I know better than anyone she needs more cooking time! I am gonna do all I can to keep her baking for at least 2 more weeks. But I also know that my body and Charlotte are on their own time frame and will come when she is ready. I just really really hope that they dads can get here in time! I really want them to be able to experience this amazing time!
    Since the doctor appointment all has been well. Still having some random contractions but really have died down since I stopped working and doing much. I have had some trouble sleeping but am feeling rested and I can tell that has helped my body settle in, hopefully for another 2-3 weeks.
Fingers and legs crossed!

33 weeks

33 weeks and getting close! I keep getting told, "oh my gosh she's dropped!" or "she's so low!" and trust me I feel it. I remember feeling this with my last just a few weeks before I delivered. She just feels heavy and keeps the pressure on my bladder! I am also starting to really feel the Braxton Hicks contractions and also some painful contractions here and there. Nothing to be too excited about but definitely showing me my body is moving toward delivery!!! It is so crazy to think that pretty soon this experience will be over. I have really started to enjoy the pregnancy and the feeling of helping. The one thing that really has surprised me about the surrogacy is the amount pressure I feel to give this family a perfectly healthy term baby. No one has put this pressure on me it's just myself. I try to put myself in their situation and really started to realize how hard it must be for them to have no control over their most precious cargo. I know that I have and will continue to do everything just perfectly and somethings are still out of my control. I just want the best for these parents and this baby. For example, earlier in the week I went to bed after working and got up a few times during my sleep and didn't feel Charlotte move. Not too weird because she was probably sleeping with me. But after I woke and had something to eat and some orange juice I still didn't feel her active self. Long story short I went to triage at Labor and Delivery to be hooked up to the monitors just to check her heart rate and movement. All was fine and I was probably worrying for nothing but I just didn't want anything to be wrong. If that had been one of my own kids I am not sure that I would have gone to triage but in this situation I felt super responsible for the health of Charlotte. I feel that more now than ever. The closer we get to delivery the more I look forward to seeing this family hold the precious cargo that I have been holding for 8 months now.

 

 

 

 

wokwo

31 and 32 weeks

Well it has taken me some time to recoup from such a busy weekend in slc. Most of my 31st week was spent relaxing, as seen below,  just I didn't realize how much it takes out of me to do such simple things now. I am feeling good but very tired and my feet are very sore again. I have found that if I plan to do anything during the day it really needs to be limited to one activity for the day. My mind wants to go go go like usual but my body has been saying slow down and take it easy... so I have listened to my body! But no hernia pain!!! Such a nice relief, I think I'm past that nasty part of pregnancy.

 

I went to the doctor today for my 32 week appointment and all was good! I got an ultrasound to check on placenta placement, since the last 2 ultrasounds were showing a low lying placenta, meaning it was too close to my cervix to deliver vaginally. But lucky for me it has moved higher up on my uterus wall and my doctor is happy to let me deliver vaginally as I have done before. I was super relieved, seeing that a c-section is always a fear for me. Even though I have seen too many to count when I think about me there it terrifies me. And then I would have had to choose just one person to be in the room with me for the delivery. Now that we got the go ahead for a vaginally delivery we can have as many in the room as we want. Not that I want that many but it's nice to know that I won't have to choose between the IF's or the IF's and my husband. Now I will have a room full of boys for the delivery of a princess.

The other good news that the ultrasound gave was Charlotte is head down, way down! No wonder I feel her pushing down on my bladder. The doctor said that my cervix was closed and long, which I clarified was a good thing and was showing no signs of preterm labor!!! But he thinks he may start checking my cervix at my next appointment (34 weeks) due to the fact that I have delivered anywhere from 36-38 weeks.

When he said that it made things so so real. I started thinking on the drive home, wow that means in 4-8 weeks we could have a baby! Holy cow where did the time go? I am now feeling so unprepared and I am not a fan of that feeling. I am going to start thinking of things that I need to do on my end to prep for this baby's arrival and gonna make sure the IF's do too. I need to get a plan for my kids for when I go into labor, and get stuff for my hospital bag, etc. It is different what I think about knowing that the baby isnt coming home with me and not having to get her stuff lined up is nice. But also knowing that this will be happening sooner rather than later makes me feel even more protective. It's amazing the amount of responsibility that I feel. I know that I have always been responsible for her health but now I feel I am going into super protective mode! I want nothing to go wrong till I can deliver her into the hands of her father. I am so aware of every twinge and cramp that it panics me when I know in my head it's all normal but my heart stresses me out. It became real to me that she is very well taken care of but I want to continue to make sure she stays safe and sound another 4 weeks at minimum.

 

30 weeks and baby shower love!

Here I am at the end of my 30th week. It was a pretty quiet week until the weekend. This was the weekend that I went to Salt Lake City to help celebrate baby Charlotte. Yes she has a name and a beautiful one with special meaning to dad. Myself and two other surrogates left Boise Friday and drove down to SLC to enjoy a girls/ surro/ baby weekend. It was so amazing to have two other girls who completely understand all that we have gone through to get to this point and the amazement we have to look forward to. The weekend started out great and as soon as we hit the Utah border it started to snow and boy did it snow. It snowed and snowed and continued to snow. I think that we had about 2-3 hours of non snowy weather. It was so neat to see because we get snow in Boise but not like this.

 We got to stay in the condo of one of the fathers. It was in downtown SLC and it was beautiful. This was my view I woke up to every morning. So pretty to see all the snow. We got the chance to go to breakfast with other Intended fathers that are from our agency and it was amazing to see what special connection the men have and the connection we have with them even if we are not carrying their babies.

 

Saturday after breakfast us girls headed out to do some serious shopping while my IF's got the prep work done for the baby shower. We had such a good time exploring the malls of SLC. I wish we had more time and money to really enjoy what the beautiful city had to offer. As shopping concluded we headed out to the IF's house to celebrate baby Charlotte.

The house looked amazing and there was so

much amazing food and drinks, all orchestrated by the IF's mom and sister. It was truly beautiful. 

This is me by the amazing dessert table that flowed with yummy treats that were all homemade and delicious. There were so many people that came to celebrate the dads addition and the excitement in the room was overwhelming. Everyone had only great things to say about what amazing parents these men were going to make and what a gift I was giving. I had a really hard time accepting their compliments because I was feeling like I was the one who was lucky to be a part of this special family. It was so nice to see how many people this baby will be surrounded by. All completely in love with her before shes even born. It made this whole experience so real and so fulfilling. I know that we have gone through some hard times to get to this place and the feeling I felt that night was worth every shot I had to do, every lab draw, everyday that I was sick and every minute that I am tired. After being a part of their night I wouldn't have wanted to be anywhere else!

 This is just one of the tables of gifts that the dads received from all the guests. There was at least two more that was full of baby gifts and the floor was covered with diapers to help get them started.

                                                                                           

 

 

 This was such a memorable night for us all and I really enjoyed meeting all of their special family and friends. And I really hope that they can meet some of my family and friends that also support them and me and Charlotte from Boise.

 

 

 

29 weeks

This was a good week. A week filled with some fun from Halloween and a week with some pain from the abdominal hernia. My family and I really enjoyed Halloween and we walked all over the neighborhood and my body continues to handle it well. No cramping no contractions just tired feet. I had lots of fun dressing up this year. Three costumes in all, one for a party, one for the kids class parties and one for trick or treating (which was my favorite!!)

 

As far as the baby goes all is well. I am really growing and people are noticing that I am getting close to delivery time. I know that we still have at least some weeks left but the time is getting closer. My hernia continues to hurt off and on. And I don't want to complain because I know I signed up for this but it is something I am not used to in my other pregnancies. This doll baby doesn't seem to be bothered by the hernia. She is constantly moving  and my stomach is constantly a different shape depending on her position. Its fun to watch her move and get comfy and to watch from the outside and imagine what she looks like. She should be about 2 1/2 to 3 pounds now and I have seen numerous babies at work at the same gestation and am getting more and more excited about bringing this baby to the IF's life.

This time next week I will be in Utah to help the dads celebrate this baby girls arrival at their baby shower. I am getting nervous and excited to meet all the wonderful people that will be in this babies life! Stay tuned!